This Post is about Whatever I Want!

I'm suffering from a minor case of writer's block, so this post is pretty poorly organized and more a cathartic outlet of thoughts. I'm publishing it because why the fuck not?

Anyone who knows me well enough knows that I have one fatal flaw: I'm really nice. What I mean is that I oftentimes worry about my friends to the point of being unable to worry about myself. My worst habit is observing other people's problems and making them my problems. This forces me to try and fix said problems, even if there is quite literally nothing that I can do. What ends up happening, then, is that I begin to feel really down because I feel like I didn't do all I could for that person. You can see how this can be an issue.

I've been quite worried about a few of my friends lately. Drugs, depression, unemployment, and general stress have been getting to them, at a dangerous level. I do what I can to try and support them, but I'm beginning to realize more and more every day that no one can help someone who won't help themselves. The other side of that coin is that I shouldn't try and help someone if they don't want my help, which is another thing I find hard to do.

Buddhism teaches that one person is unable to help another person unless they do not share suffering with that person. The Sanksrit/Pali word for "compassion", Karuṇā, literally means "to suffer with someone", so if we are already suffering ourselves from a specific issue, how can we hope to help another person and alleviate their suffering?

Compassion is that which makes the heart of the good move at the pain of others. It crushes and destroys the pain of others; thus, it is called compassion. It is called compassion because it shelters and embraces the distressed. --The Buddha

 So, what I have done in detaching myself from some people is difficult for me to do. In fact, I'm still trying to convince to myself that what I am doing is the right thing. All I can do is all I can do, though, and beyond that, they have to want to be helped.

I've written two different pieces that tackle that subject, one of which was posted earlier in "Ecstasy is Torment". Four days ago, I performed that piece in public for the first time and was met with a very unexpected response.

A girl who seemed younger than me by about a year or two came up to me after we had packed up and were beginning to leave. She caught my arm and asked if she could talk to me. She looked me in the eye and told me

"That piece about drugs you wrote came at exactly the right time for me. I have a few friends who are dealing with drugs right now and I've been really confused as to how to deal with them."

 I thanked her for her kind words and told her to stay strong, for her friends, but also for herself. To support her friend in the most positive way possible is the number one thing she can do. Walking away that day I realized that I had not been taking my own advice. I had been so caught up in how I felt I needed to help people that I did not realize I was suffering too much to be able to do so. Even as I type this, I smile knowing that my words had a positive impact on someone, and that in turn had a positive impact on me.

People always ask me why I write, and I always give them a different answer. Sometimes I say that I write so that I have a positive impact on people and to help people. Sometimes I say I write so that I can vent out some of my more negative emotions. Sometimes it's so that I can get people to think, to question. Sometimes, it's just for the wordplay, just for the rhyme scheme, just because I like having something to share. But a lot of the time, it's just for the hell of it.

I'm writing a Nuzlocke novella, as you might know, and I plan on doing 4 more (probably shorter than the current one, though), one for each "generation" of Pokemon. I'm re-writing a piece I lost in the hard drive crash called "I Stand". I'm writing a Dungeons and Dragons campaign in which the most valuable and powerful substance is chocolate.

That wouldn't be too different than real life, now that I think about it.

Now, being true to this post's title, I will offer you something only tangentially relevant.

 

Just to offer a little bit of insight as to the kind of funny, quirky, entertaining improvising Random Receipts does.

If you like my writing, you can join the site to the right of the page, like Speaking with Storms on Facebook or follow me on Twitter. If you have questions or just want to chat, I'm on Formspring, too!

Peace and Love, thank you for reading!

Interview 2: Flex

Earlier this month, I interviewed my good friend Jeremy. Today I’m writing about a mutual friend of ours, another influence of mine, and a fellow member of Random Receipts, Fidelis. I’ve most often seen Fidelis making music on a piano, djembe or goblet drum, but he’s also a talented writer, painter, and singer. 

-So how did you get involved doing creative work, and how long have you been writing?
I've been creating ever since I can remember. I recall when I was a small boy, my older brother would draw comic book super heroes and cut them out, and we would play with them. I was maybe 4 or 5 years young at the time. So since then, creativity has been in my life. That been said, I only just started to write music on the Piano Forte since the 3rd week of November, 2010. Aside from that sort of writing, I wrote my first poem in 2009 and since then I've been forming quotes and writing spoken word pieces. Before writing though, my primary means of expression is painting. I started to paint in the early half of 2007. And so I guess you could say that, I really began to take art as a whole, more seriously, since I was 17.

-So far, what has been your best memory doing creative work?
I have lots of great memories, but honestly as I write this, it is the day after I performed at 'Honey' [a lounge] in Minneapolis, and it was pretty awesome!! I also really enjoy working with my group members from Random Receipts, everyone involved, including the interviewer on this blog [aw, shucks] - is talented in their own unique way and so working alongside Random Receipts is always a great time for me.

-What piece that you’ve written do you feel best expresses you?
I'd say that my piece titled 'The Catalyst' is the one piece of spoken word that truly captures my inner truth, i.e. my inner most fear. Otherwise all of my pieces, poetry, painting, piano compositions, short stories, best express me.

-What has been your biggest influence in your writing?
Life and its experiences influence me the most in creating; as broad as that sounds.

-Any advice for people who want to get into the creative scene?
Yes. Enjoy yourself in your art, whichever it may be. Have passion for it. Dedicate your time in practice. And, share it!

-A quote that inspires you?

"In all forms of it. Our art, in years to come, will define our time. And so therefore we must create!!"

- Fidelis Odozi.

THE EYE WITNESS

My thoughts are naked as I sit amidst very relaxed trees that surround a body of water where two lovers stroll together from one end of the lake to the other.
I suspect the lagging lover to be the male because of the way in which he tails her with admiration and drinks the flow of water behind her glide every now and then.
She turns abruptly to him at the loud sound of an awaking fish.
He moves closer to her as though to say, 'I am here, do not fear.'
Far off into the distance a lonely bird stalks the two lovers and does a brilliant job staying out of sight. He or she might have been an ex boyfriend, a very protective parent, or perhaps an ex girlfriend, hell, how should I know?
Suddenly though, an even louder sound enters the air, its a human being smacking his floating device on the water.
I Shout at him. I say "Hey! You over there, you're disturbing the love birds!"
I then realize that I too am adding to the noise but it is too late, the birds by now have panicked and so they changed course and hurried down a different direction.
I felt terrible about this.
I felt as tho I played a huge role in the destruction of a lovely stroll down the stream.
But things turned out for the better, it seems, because due to them changing directions they were able to spot the stalker and so they swam even closer together
And were on a new path, one that was far off into the distance with no stalker and no human beings.
It was beautiful.
I got up and walked back home with a smile that slowly turned into laughter.
I might have looked crazy to the people driving by, but hell, I had just witnessed love on water.
I had absolutely no care at all.

--Fidelis Odozi

Fidelis is an old soul, the first Nigerian man I ever met, and shows me that he truly lives up to his name which means "Faithful". His eye for art and affinity for phrases puts a smile on my face.

If you like what you've read, want to learn more about Random Receipts or about this blog, or even just spread the word about this blog, you can like Speaking with Storms on Facebook or follow me on Twitter.

Thank you for reading.  

Interview 1: Jerem-why

I've started to meet some really interesting people doing my own creative work, so for my own sake I wanted to ask them a few questions about what they do. The answers I got back were really interesting, so I think I'll share them with you. Today, you will learn a little bit about my good friend Jeremy, who is a spoken-word artist like myself.

-Jeremy, how did you get involved doing creative work in the first place?
"I would have to say that I got involved in doing creative work when I met Fidelis, Josh, and Natan [other members of the group] and we started jamming out in the piano rooms at school just freestyling. I used to write a lot when I was 18/19 but not until 4 or 5 months ago did I really start to dive into writing from the depths of me."

-So far, what has been your best memory doing creative work?
"I would have to say that the best memory I have doing creative work would have to be the joy and elation of sharing my piece "My Brother" with Fidelis face to face just after I had written it. There was an immense creative energy between us that I felt upon reading that to him."

 -What piece that you've written do you feel best expresses you?
"To be honest, even though it was written while I was withdrawing from Nicotine, I would have to say it is my piece "Dear Non-smoking Friends" because before I wrote that piece I had never been so honest in my writings...ever."

-What has been your biggest influence in writing?
"My biggest influence in my writings have been [the other members of] Random Receipts. Each and every person involved with the group has inspired me in ways I cannot explain with mere words. But most definitely the sharing of creativity between all of us is what inspires my writings most." 

-Do you have any advice for people who want to get into the creative scene?
"My advice for people who want to get into the creative scene is to stop trying to get into the creative scene. You are already a creative being who creates every moment of every day which means you are already in the creative scene-- you just don't realize it yet. Try and find wonderful people who's ego's aren't too inflated, try and find genuine people who are accepting of others works and share with them everything you've ever written even if you're scared shitless to do so. Either that, or, come hang out with Random Receipts!"  

-A quote that inspires you?

"The answer is never the answer. What's really interesting is the mystery. If you seek the mystery instead of the answer, you'll always be seeking. I've never seen anybody really find the answer. They think they have, so they stop thinking. But the job is to seek mystery, evoke mystery, plant a garden in which strange plants grow and mysteries bloom. The need for mystery is greater than the need for an answer."

-Ken Kesey

The reason this quote inspires me is because it reminds me of the Dao.


Creativity is flowing through my veins, step to me and you'll get love filled words 
that will destroy your ego more quickly than clinched fists will damage your physical body, 
consider me something similar to godly the way I create something out of nothing, 
so I ask you...to the plate, what is it that you bring? Do you draw, paint, sing? 
What is it that you have to offer the world around you? 
I ASK YOU, what is it that you do? 
You must answer this question before I allow you into my temple because my inner realms are sacred, 
there's only room for love, not hatred. 
I'm not down with fake shit or a quick fix, I'm not here to listen to your clever words the way you play tricks, I'm in the moment so consider me present, 
if you're searching for a guru I have nothing to share with you, no life lessons, 
I'm over the endless nights of self created stresses, 
I have left anxiety begging me for more but you should've seen how quickly I shut that door. 
Goodnight to the fear of night and good morning to the love of day, where sun filled skies, and the chatter amongst birds guide me along my path and show me the Way.

--Jeremy Kemp 


I had a lot of fun contemplating Jeremy's answers. He has a lot of insight into the world around him, and he oftentimes isn't afraid to share what he's thinking. 

If you like what you've read, you can like Speaking with Storms on Facebook or follow me on Twitter.
Thanks for reading! 

Creativity in the Twin Cities

Sorry, readers, it's been a while since my last post. I've been downtown, doing creative things with creative people.

Last Thursday, the 7th, I went to downtown St. Paul with a few friends. We all are part of a collective called Random Receipts, with the purpose of fostering creativity with a light emphasis on music and spoken-word poetry. Around St. Paul are scattered pianos, painted and sheltered from the weather, in tune and everything, free for the public to play. So, naturally, a group of creative souls such as ourselves couldn't resist. We found a piano in front of a music college, and just began creating. I myself elaborated on a piece I had written earlier, played my friend's djembe, and plunked out a few melodies on the piano.

Fidelis on Piano and myself on Djembe

There was a young  girl, about 13 or 14, there with her younger brother, and she was listening very attentively to what we were performing. Eventually, we asked her to do something with us. After a lot of coercing and friendly encouragement, she sang something for us... And it blew us all away. The girl had talent, there was no doubt of that, but what really astounded me was her willingness to walk up to a group of older guys and perform something herself. This girl was ballsier than any of us there.

Then, just yesterday, we went back to downtown St. Paul to a small deli near the farmer's market. There, we performed spoken word, hip-hop, classical, and foreign music with a slight rock vibe to a fairly good sized audience. It was the first time I had done something like that, and the crowd (as well as my fellow members) were all very supportive. I met a lot of very cool people and my family and a few friends were able to see exactly what it is I do. That, I think, was the main reason I wanted to go so badly.

Left to Right: my brothers Fidelis, Joe, Jeremy, and myself

I wrote the following piece while I was at the deli waiting for others to show up-- I was the first to arrive, so I opened up my notebook, found my favorite pen and just freewrote to pass the time. I was somewhat surprised with how organized it turned out.

Black Coffee

 "No, I'm waiting for a few friends, don't mind me.
Well, maybe some coffee, black as midnight and bitter as my ex.
I do need to wake up. Don't we all?
Sure, I got up in the morning. I got up.
But I'm not awake.

I'm sorry, Miss, say that again?
Oh, no, I'm not from around here.
But, say, this coffee's not bad."

I carried this smalltalk on for another hour,
waiting for my own Godot to show up.

These days, if I have any money, I waste it.
If I have any time, I waste it.
If I have any energy, I waste it.
But, say, this coffee's not bad.
Maybe it's time to wake up.

The Twin Cities area has a very unique art scene, so I'm very happy to be so close to such a diverse movement. The best thing about the feel of the area is that it's all very supportive, very open, and very kind. You might get harsh criticism every now and then, but that's because they do genuinely want you to get better.

If anyone is interested in getting involved with Random Receipts, you can sent me a private message or leave a line in the comments. We'd love to create with you.

You can also follow me on Twitter or become a follower on the right if you're so inclined. I'm also considering a Speaking with Storms page on Facebook, so we'll see where that idea goes.  I went ahead and created the Facebook fan page, so if you like what you read, click here to "Like" me on Facebook! Thanks for reading, everyone.